Weird Sisters are back!

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Younger Sister (S2) was reading a book with an expression of utmost concentration when Elder Sister (S1) decided it was too long before she had acted like a nut-case.

S1: *very innocently* When will you write your next post?

S2: *annoyed at being disturbed* Shut up.

S1: Tell naaaa.

S2: *pursing her lips* I don’t know. Sometime soon may be. I have a good mind to write about you and your madness.

S1: *eyes lit up* Yah!! Write about me and TC . And about our intuitive powers and about all those miracles??! Pleej!

S2: *shoots suspicious looks* Why are you so eager to be written about eh?

S1: *blushes furiously* I just... you know… it’s.. um…

S2: I know! You feel like a celebrity when I write about you! Hah! You pesky thing. I am soo not writing about you any more and letting you have that pleasure.

S1: *slightly dejected* Umm… please please write na. Write, okay? Nice girl. TC will also be so pleased.

S2: What is there to be pleased about? I only make fun of you on my blog! Muahahah.

S1: But for once you can write all nice thingies about me nah? So that people think I am all virtuous and everything?

S2: *shakes her head with an air of importance* What-ever. *goes back to reading*

Note: Do NOT think S2 is a creep. Well yes, she can be pretty creepy at times, but not always!

Metaphor for life

Either I have run out of words or Calvin is sooooo articulate that he leaves me speechless.


Friday, October 27, 2006

The Day Abhu (and BO) Goofed Up

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

The day begun with a dry note since Blogowner(BO) woke up with a dust allergy which caused her to sneeze like 20 times which culminated with a nose-bleed. By the way, she woke up at 9.30 whereas she was supposed to be up by 7 since she had to write 3 experiments in her physics and chemi journals. She had 2 practical classes, consecutively, that day. And immediately after that, she had classes at her dear tutorial. The day was packed.

She wrote the journals in a frenzy, took a shower, had her lunch and was off to college. She attended the first class and the first (phy) practical class with Abhu. In the phy lab the two girls couldn't get enough of giggling. They were giggling so uncontrollably (in their minds and even on the exterior) that Abhu let out little giggles right under Ma'am's nose while she was demonstrating a certain experiment which required utmost attention. They thanked their lucky stars that Ma'am didn't notice that and safely left the lab without getting screamed at. They had an hour in between, so the two of them decided to go to the canteen and do a little pet-pooja. BO demanded that Abhu should treat her this time since she had gone broke feeding Abhu. Abhu agreed. They got their stuff and were giggling and talking and eating when they were joined by a third friend, Curly Haired Goat (CHG) (Goat because she is a capricorn. Curly Hair because, duh, she has curly hair). CHG also got some food for herself and BO made Abhu treat CHG also to which Abhu agreed.

They ate.

They left.

They forgot to PAY the canteen-fellow.

And this was remembered by ABHU when they were returning home, 2 and a half hours later. She smsed BO to let her know of ‘their’ blunder but BO conveniently decided that SHE was guilty of no crime since it was ABHU’s treat.


In their chem practical class, they were supposed to perform an experiment, a part of which consisted of diluting the bench acid with distilled water and then again performing some other steps to get a certain value which should be close to 10 or so. If one doesn’t dilute the acid properly then they can get wild results. Abhu and BO were doing the experiment together. BO had washed and filled the measuring flask with the required amount of acid and sent Abhu to fetch a wash bottle containing distilled water. Abhu went, found a wash bottle which was empty, filled some water-like substance from a large jar which had a label ‘Distilled Water’ and came back. They diluted the acid, shook it properly et al and performed the following steps. They got a value of 1.3 instead of a 10ish value! They got such a value 2-3 times. This indicated that the acid was pretty strong. How come? They wondered. They told Ma’am that they were getting a value of 1.3. She got majorly pissed with the lab assistant(LA) since she thought he must not have prepared the chemicals properly. But the LA turned defensive and told her that some other groups had got proper values like 9.4, 9.6 etc. They testified. BO and Abhu blushed a deep shade of crimson-red.

Where could the mistake be? After a lot of back-tracking, it was found out that the jar labelled ‘Distilled Water’ actually contained acid!! Abhu had filled acid in the wash bottle in place of water! Of course, BO was quick to chide her. How could she not see the yellow tinge and figure out that it wasn’t water but acid? When they charged the LA with placing mis-leading labels he smiled and asked them if their lab was advanced enough to store distilled water. How on earth were THEY supposed to know THAT? Anyway, they made several attempts to talk in loud tones when people from their class passed by…. Just to let them know that it wasn’t really their fault and they were very skilled chemistry students who obviously cannot make such grave mistakes!

“ Yaaa… the jar had ACID instead of WATER…”

“ How were WE supposed to know that???”

“It’s the LA’s fault… our experiment was perfectly fine otherwise!”

“Yes yes… the acid was too strong…. That’s why we got 1.3”

Such things were 'spoken' near the parking place, near BO's car, where students were walking by or driving by. Later, BO received are-you-mad-or-what type glances from her driver!

Such image-damaging incidents led BO and Abhu to think they must tread carefully on the 23rd of every month.

God bless them!

Amen and Awomen.

Carrier In Yie Tee

Monday, October 16, 2006

We have our IT practicals every Sunday at a certain NIIT branch. Today was no exception. Abhu and I entered the lab, took our seats, exchanged hey-wassups with friends and waited for ma’am to come. However, who did come in through that door was an odd figure wearing a orange-yellow-striped shirt and a pair of ill-fitting *ahem* black pants. He had curly hair (the most unflattering kind), wore a strange I-am-in-charge-type smile and held a bunch of postcard-sized yellow cards. Words started spilling out of his mouth, very few of which were deciphered by a scandalised Abhu (scandalised because she is least accomodating when it comes to people who don’t seem to know what they’re saying) and a on-the-verge-of-bursting-into-wild-giggles me. I made a mental note of recording all that he said.

….Myzelv blah blah. Yie yam the {fuzzes up the word} head ower here. Today, yie yam yere to giff you some knowledge on the real world scenario and jov frosfects yin thee Yie Tee industry…. Today, ower buddy lenguase says a lot about who we are. Our buddy lenguase shows iff we are convident, shows ower convidence…. Like yie am a convident man {gesticulates around his body} yie know what yie bhaant. Ower buddy lenguase shows ower buddy parts (methinks- oooohhh?? Really?!) bhaat we are composed of… what makes up ower buddy …. (Abhu sniggers)… my convidence is my strens… bhaat is yooer strens? {asks me}

Er… as in.. okay, people say I am articulate….

End yooers?? {motioning towards Abhu}

Umm.. I can analyse well (methinks- hehehhhheeehh)

Yooou?? {to another fellow}

Blah blah

(he asked many other people what their ‘strens’ was)

Wokay… bherry good.. so.. are you looking for a good carrier?

Abhu: Obviously. D-uh (she actually said that loud!)

Obviously eh?? Yes yes…. So, what is a carrier?

Your professional life?



No, that is not carrier . Carrier is when my friend tells blah blah is working with Infosys, Wipro yearning so much…. He is giving respect. That, my deaaars, is carrier. Respects is carriers. Yoou haf to think what yoou want then get it. Yoou must have resources… like, yoou keep dreaming of going to Goa with yooer girlfriend, enjoy ower theyaar and haf a nice time {gesticulates and smiles devilishly} but in your pocket {puts hand in his back pocket} yoou haf no munney. Then why yooer dreaming about Goa?

Me and Abhu let out little giggles.

{looks into one of the cards} Would you like companies to run after you? Bhaat can you do to make company run after you?

Student: Cheat them and lootofy millions from them?

Blah sniggers.

Abhu: Join NIIT. Hah!

heheheh… {blushes} yes yes. Well… but.. hehehe

Abhu: That’s what you were getting to.

Heehhe…. Well, I am working for an organijasun so I will say my organijasun is best. But I will not force you to join. Choice is yooers.okay… {tries desperately to change subject} {looks into the card} Are yoou yinterested to know about yie tee jobs?

Abhu: {sitting up straighter and turning on an expression of utmost attention} Um… yea..

We are having a workshop here… 3 days… you send yooer phriends on day 1 and 2 and you come with them on day 3.

Student: So, we aren’t really invited for the first two days?!

Yes yes you are. But get yooer non-Yie Tee phriends. Yie will give yoou theej cards which you will distribute among yooer phriends. Okay? Okay.

{gives out the cards}

{walks towards the door. Peeks in and says—If I don’t see yoou and yooer phriends then next Sunday……….. }

Abhu and I went into hysteric-giggling-mode after blah left.


Note: No offence meant to NIIT or blah blah!! :D

Where art thou?

Saturday, October 14, 2006

A couple of minutes ago, I was talking to P on MSN (may God bless them!). As usual, our conversation consisted of the most inane topics which would make no sense whatsoever to anyone who wasn’t me or P, which basically is, the rest of the world. Now, she is known as the-one-who-wished-her-caring-loving-awesome-nice-friend-belated-birthday-2-days-BEFORE-her-actual-birthday. That was like, the height of goofing up. No, the Height of goofing up! I teased her to my heart’s content (which, by the way, was some teasing). Our conversation drifted towards people whom we knew, whom we are no longer in touch with and who seem to have become very different from what they were when we knew them. Of course, we weren’t too pleased with all that, but like, does anyone give a damn about what P and I think?

After our little (actually it was pretty long) chat, I remembered all my old pals (and not so-friendly ‘pals’ too) and kept thinking about them for quite some time(yes yes. I think about the good, the bad and the ugly)(and none of them fail to bring fuzzy memories back to my rotten old brain!). That was what made me write this. I decided, before I become too old and forget all those people, I must document bits and parts of the hazy pictures in my mind. Later on, I can read this, smile and go like “Mmm… those were the days.”

Since I have been in like 6-7 schools I shall start with my earliest memory of someone whom I called a ‘friend’. She was someone called Poulomi. She and I were friends back in 1st and 2nd standard. I would always irritate her with my standard line- “Poulomi, follow me.” (Yea, I was a creep back then too. Muahaha). That used to majorly piss her off! In the same class there was this girl called N1 whom I admired a lot because I thought she was very pretty and all that. She was. Then there was my very first crush (in 1st). It was on a guy called Prince (yea, that was his name. Nice nah?) and he was a teacher’s son. Back then, being a teacher’s son was very cool. So don’t laugh at me!

I did my 3rd standard in another school, in another city. I didn’t get a chance to make many friends in this new school but I do remember a few faces. First was this quirky chick called Itarthi. She was the girl-who-knew-everything-about-everyone. However, I remember getting majorly pissed off with her this once when she mixed up my cup cake with someone else’s (it was Republic day or some such day when they distribute cakes and chocolates) and I couldn’t figure out which one was mine and had to give up my cake (Hey, remember Joey? Even I don’t share food!). Ooohh and I can’t miss Ashwitha who I swear looked like Aishwarya Rai junior. She had lovely eyes. She was the snobbish monitor though and I was one of her favourites so she used to make me write her notes (I was all innocent and nice, okay?!).

Then I made sooooooo many friends in 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th and 8th that it’s impossible to write about all of them. Of course, all of them are no longer friends and most have been reduced to mere ‘acquaintances’. Isn’t it sad that despite all this technology and keep-in-touch-with-old-buds-networks one hardly has any long time pals remaining. Dearest of them all and who still is a dear dear dear pal is P, like I have said before. This Sag never fails to cheer me up and she has always been the there-for-you type friend. She is someone with whom I’ve cracked the poorest of jokes and yet we have laughed our asses out at those dumb jokes.

We were talking about how a certain someone (who was known as Machchar (M), between the two of us) had turned into a ‘dude’ in 10th. Now, as a matter of policy, I always laugh at things that should be laughed at. Isn’t this the stupidest thing one can attempt – being someone they are not? Trying to be all out-there sorts only makes you look like an utter idiot. Seriously. It’s much better to be a genuine nerd than to be a phony ‘dude’.

Virgo L is someone I call my ‘childhood friend’. We were the best of friends in 4th and 5th. We used to skate together, play house-house, teacher-teacher, make-up party together and used to romp around the colony in the evenings. She was the one who taught me how to cycle. We had these ‘Fun-ways’ which were actually slopes down parking slots. We had numbered all of them and would skate down these fun-ways with much gusto. Actually, even Scorpio D used to skate with us back then. The three of us used to play Cats or Charlie’s Angels at D’s place. We even used to have little ‘picnics’ in D’s and L’s kitchen balconies! L had taught us a novel way of eating Kurkure back then which, I must confess, was just the way a pig would probably eat them. Nonetheless, it was all great fun.

With my ‘building friends’ I used to play carrom. And I was good at it. So after all, I was good at some sport!

Then there was Scorpio V. We were like the best of buds in 5th, 6th and 7th. Both of us had Sanskrit as a subject (in place of marathi) and those sanskrit classes are somewhat like my current IT classes with Capricorn Abhu. Both of us were good at the subject and we would discuss topics that involved pens that were sold in local trains and such. She was the most amazing artist back then (and even now) and I loved this particular artwork of her so much that I made the exact same thing myself and stuck it on my wall. We were both pretty geeky and nice-type (heylo, what’s wrong with that?!) and I was horrified to learn later on that the guys in our class used to call us LL (lallu log)! Shit. Anyway, like I care! By the way, I recently got in touch with V through the marvel called Orkut. It feels great!

There were many others like K, N, S1, P1, A who were friends, the ones whom I liked to call my good friends. Sadly, they have all drifted away now.

Actually, I wanted to pay special tribute to those people whom I’d secretly been paying tribute to. You know, I am a firm believer in Karma. If you’re nice to your friends, then they’ll pray for you and prayers work. They manifest miracles. So, isn’t it better to have a few genuine friends* who care for each other than to have many ingenuine ‘friends’ who really don’t give a damn about you.

P used to be the perfect companion for my afternoon-trips to Society (a store in santa cruz which must’ve raked in millions when I craved for chocolates at the most unearthly hours) and also to Linking Road, where we used to shop and window-shop ( P lived very close to my place in Santa Cruz). L was one virgo whom I actually got along with. She and I used to think we were the most perverted souls in our class. (Yeah right. Little did we know about the others.) L would say, “Gosh Sneha, we’re so corrupted! Heeeheeehee”. You get the picture right? I used to go to the melas with V. She was my first ‘friend’. K and I had given about a million blank calls in less than 4 months. We even used to give R blank (and prank) calls!! Sheesh. I hope he never comes across this one. N and I would burst out laughing the minute we looked at each other. She and I had honoured A with what we called BBA (the full form of which shall not be disclosed in these hallowed pages). I remember so many funny things that A had confessed to. For example, apparently, he liked playing with Barbie dolls as a child. I also remember that I’d learnt the word ‘procrastinate’ from him. P1 used to actually hate my handwriting and would still say that it was okay just to make me happy (even though I knew the real thing). S1 used to call me up before the sanskrit exam to ask the portion and to do some translation work for him.

I remember everything about everyone. Now, Scorpio TC and Capri Abhu are my closest girls and recently they even helped me get out of a sticky situation (the stupid-fellow-incident) which I really really appreciate. May be, after some years, I’ll write about TC and Abhu and about all the things we do. Now, that should be fun. :D

* by genuine friends I mean those whom you can trust. Really trust. I remember R and A. they seemed to be each other’s closest pals. I was appalled to hear each bitch about the other to me! and they weren’t girls, in case you think they were. Hah! Anyway, I did know many such venomous creatures (one in particular) who didn’t have a single ‘friend’ whom she hadn’t bitched about. I hope she’s not the same any longer.

Taaza Khabar

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Firstly, Blogowner(BO) and sister, S, are spent after 10 days of lazying around and doing nothing other than reading, whiling away time on the internet (courtesy Orkut) and sleeping(a lot a lot a lot). This has caused them to feel utterly guilty about their conduct in the past few days and they have hence resolved to control their frivolous urges henceforth.

Secondly, driver problems have yet again haunted BO, S and family. It was learnt that the previous driver used to actually give driving lessons to his buddies while waiting for BO in front of her classes! He had the audacity to do that. So now the mystery of the numerous dents on the car and the missing petrol have been soved. New driver looks like a fool, but he isn’t. He is one dhoort fellow who is soon going to be sent away. And just for the record, this fellow had learnt driving in BO’s car in those sneaky driving lessons conducted by previous idiotic-pain-in-the-posterior driver.

Thirdly, tomorrow happens to be BO’s birthday. She has already received birthday wishes in ‘advance’ (again, courtesy Orkut, where they notify people of their friends’ birthday a good 7-10 days in advance) and has even received ‘belated’ wishes from P!! *laughing like a lunatic* Apparently, P (dear dear dear Sag friend who happens to share her birthday with S and has declared that BO and she are ‘soul sisters’ since, in her words- “arre i hav decided 2 call u my sista coz our sad lives hav evrythin in common”) thought BO’s birthday was on 9th (courtesy an email from Hi5 which notifies people of their friends’ birthdays 2 days in advance) (BO is guessing this is the root cause. However P could have even dreamed about BO’s birthday) and dashed off an email expressing deep regret at having ‘forgotten’ BO’s birthday and how bad she was feeling about the entire episode. The mail, in turn, lightened up a disgruntled BO’s mood and made her giggle so hysterically that S thought someone might have added automatic tickling hands to the chair which tickled the hell out BO. P is such a sweetheart!

Fourthly, BO’s dear classes have started. And TC has exams at college which is why she isn’t attending the first seven classes. And BO hates her plight.

Fifthly, Abhu has grown supremely suspicious about a certain something mentioned in the previous post and won’t stop pestering BO. She simply won’t take ‘I am not telling’ for an answer! The nosy goat!

That’s about it.