BlogOwner Rants About Happy Endings

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

I’m all for happy endings. Now, tell me, what’s wrong with happy endings? That they aren’t real enough? Too fairytale-ish? They happen only in movies? What are we clashing on here? A) that happy endings are not possible in real life or B) you and I won’t have a happy ending?

I was watching Pretty Woman today and what struck me the most was that there actually are very few movies that make any sense at all and have a happy ending. A happy ending that is could be real. There are also very few books that seem to satisfy these criteria. Cynical writers? Or is it really so that happy endings are rare and hence we don’t write about it? Is it not so that we tend to write about that which is not or that what one wants or that which is, but with a certain degree of spin to it? What we are living, what is here and now is so difficult to write about. There is probably no novelty in that. Why would I want to read a book which describes, accurately and with every single detail, what it is to be Sneha and what it is to wake up at 8.20 am, shower at top-speed, rush to class, sleep (mentally) in class, have lunch, go to the library and work, ‘bond’ with people in the library, go back to the room at midnight and sleep? Well, I’d say that I would indeed read such a book if it were not written by me, which obviously wouldn’t happen because I wouldn’t do such a thing. But then again, I would read it to see my life, no, my daily chores (that’s not my life) through someone else’s eyes because there would certainly be some spin on it. It wouldn’t be what I live. And who else would read it? Nobody, except my stalker, if any, perhaps. And in any case, this wouldn’t be a book about what is, because it’s not written by me and nobody but I knows what is. So even if anybody else read it, it would be because it is not about what is. So either way I win. You get what I’m saying, don’t you?

Happy endings happen in real life. Now, there is really no ‘end’. Hence, there are no endings. Hence happy endings aren’t possible. What is possible is just, well, being happy. And that happens. So why are people saying all the time that happy endings are not real enough? Of course, they’re real if you assume there’s an end. This leads us to ask, what is an end? If we are to assume an end, then that end would be more of a turn or a culmination of certain events. There actually is a problem in the terminology and not in the idea itself. When two people fall in love and tell each other that, that’s a happy event, a happy turn, a happy end assuming both of them die that instant. Assuming they don't,they get married, that’s another happy turn. Then they have problems. They get, what is called, real. They take each other for granted. But they do come to some agreement at the end of each such set of events and live this way. Loving each other, hopefully. If they’ve managed to do that, then they’ve been happy. This brings us to the very definition of ‘happy’. What is being happy? I won’t define it, because it means something tangibly different to each one of us, but is the same in essence. A lot of people have tried, and failed, to define it. That’s not because – in the words of some idiot- that we’re not good enough to define what it is, but because the language we communicate in not equipped to define it. Everybody knows what it is and I say peace to that.

Anne of Green Gables is one movie, where there’s no such ‘end’. Anne and Gilbert do get married, but that’s only their happy turn, not their happy ending. When the knight in shining armour comes and rescues Vivian in Pretty Woman, it’s not the end, it’s the beginning of the story. A happy turn. So why is such a thing so unreal? We all get a taste of that feeling a lot many times in life. I’m sure you can recount at least 5 such turns which really made you feel that you’re special and that you’re you, a distinct soul in this sea of human beings, then why are happy turns, or if we can to accept the faulty terminology and proceed, happy endings unreal or rare? If it can happen to you, who may be at the most, say 24, 5 times already, then what makes you think happy endings aren’t possible? Why is pursuing your love so different from pursuing what you want in your work-life? I’ll tell you why. Because you value the former a little bit more. So you don’t want to make mistakes. But you know what? You have to go for it. You have to do as the 8 of coins says. You have to work towards it and glory will be yours. You will have a happy turn, a happy ending. And guess what, it’s not only you who wants that. The other person also wants it. It’s just so absolutely idiotic to not do anything about it and say happy endings are unreal and rare. Don’t be like Celine and the guy (I’ve forgotten his name) in Before Sunrise. Be like Edward and Vivian, like Anne and Gilbert, like Oliver and Jenny, like all those who loved love enough. You do not want to live all your life thinking “Oh, I should’ve done that, I should’ve tried that.” If Edward had not gone ahead in Pretty Woman and they’d have met after 10 years, they’d probably have been like the two in Before Sunset. Full of regret. Do you want that to happen to the story of your life? Or do you want your sequel to be like Anne and Gilbert’s where they don’t ‘live happily ever after’ because ‘ever after’ is not one day. They do live happily, yes. But they are not regretful. At the worst, they may fall out of love and become indifferent to each other. They may even start hating each other. Then, they’d think they rushed into it, or that they were foolish. But they wouldn’t regret not having done something. At the worst, they’d think they made a mistake. But they’ll certainly value their days of happiness because they did have that happy turn. They were happy at some point. It’s better to have that burst of happiness for a few days or months or years than not have it all AND have regrets. So even on a cost benefit analysis, going for it wins. Because this way, happy turns are guaranteed.

Please, do it, ok? Thanks. I had to say this.


indiegurl said...

....and thus do we blunder into the realms of deontology and epistemology...

interesting and passionate, if slightly breathless. :D

Sneha said...

i did not know what deontology was until now. i wikied it. i still don't know what it is, but i know something about it. i don't know what this is. but this is really very simple. it's what is simple that is so difficult for us to understand because of its simplicity.

another brick in the wall said...

in fact if u look at ur life, not so closely, and try to capture it.. u can actually see it as a set of different movies combined into one.. view it in parts.. it'll be the weirdest kinda movie you'll ever come across.. go into depth and start analysing every part in detail.. (of cors we are playing the lead cz it's our movie).. and u can see each part end - never happily or sadly enough.. ending can never be happy or sad.. it just is

after having well thought over i arrive at this.. regret, guilt and these sorda emotions are nothing but forms of expressing laziness.. just an excuse to stop ourselves from living today.. it's all pointless and we all know it.. it's more like filling ur life with void deliberately

one story ends and other begins.. every moment is another story.. we just fail to see when the movie has ended.. it's not cz we are not paying attention enough.. it's cz we are too involved in another movie.. we are busy judging and wondering over what has ended.. the start just gets ignored... i guess an analogy can be drawn between the new turn u speak of and the new movie i'm talkin about.. but the difference is i don't believe in either happiness or sadness.. the movie might end for you but it might just be starting for the other person.. but we don't care about the other person as we are worried about the lead (us).. and if you say that "oh it was a happy ending".. then i say.. that there is something begining in the end itself and that may or may not be happy.. we never know.. so now tell me how was it a "happy" ending in first place.. you can as well call it a "sad begining"

that's why i feel.. the best way of going about it is to let the life be.. stop judging it.. there is a start and there is an end.. reminiscing over yesterday is the death of today.. accept, adapt and live the new movie.. we don't have much of life remaining anyway

good post.. really good one

raghu said...

kya chaaaaat tha be :P

Vatsala said...

the latter part of the post, thank you for that : ) - it's reassuring to know that someone else thinks the same way. : )

Lin said...

'tis true.

We can only make our endings, if at all, happy.

And like they say, "Happy endings are only the beginnings..."

So many questions, but I adore.

Love the "book about me" part, hehe, though even people who know you well would probably read it, apart form your stalker ofcourse! Ass!

Sneha said...

@ suk- :) to each its own

@ raghu- arre?!

@ vatsala- great minds think alike ;)

@ lin- Exactly my point, so many questions. But they're rhetorical to me. :D

Divya said...

Awesome topic.. and you said it right about those happy turns... who says there is an end to anything anyway? movies DO always end with the guy getting the girl and living "happily ever after". Noone bothers about morning sickness or taxes or about the nagging that creeps in etc etc... life is a bunch of movies as suk said.. back to back.. and every time a happy turn comes by... thats the end of that movie... begin the next one till the next turn comes by.. good post ya...

raghu said...

i loved both before sunrise and before sunset for many a reasons.. one of them was their ending.
but i really dont have anything to say about the post.

Anonymous said...

Areey ? when have u grown up to think like this .. ?? pat.. pat !
yes, there are never any ends, what we experience at some more intense, or more critical junctures of life are only the bends ... upto you to make the most of it .. and start a new beginning .